Ronaldo, Luis Figo and Wayne Rooney are standing before God at the throne of Heaven.

God looks at them and says; "Before granting you a place at my side, I must first ask you what you believe in."

Addressing Ronaldo first he asks, "What do you believe?"

Ronaldo looks God in the eye and states passionately, "I believe football to be the food of life. Nothing else brings such unbridled joy to so many people from the slums of Rio to the bright lights of Madrid. I have devoted my life to bring such joy to people who stood on the terraces supporting their club."

God looks up and offers Ronaldo the seat to his left.

He then turns to Luis Figo, "And you, Luis, what do you believe?"

Figo stands tall and proud, "I believe courage, honour and passion are the fundamentals to life and I've spent my whole playing career providing a living embodiment of these traits."

God, moved by the passion of the speech offers Figo the seat to his right.

Finally, he turns to Wayne Rooney , "And you, Wayne, what do you believe?"

"I believe", says Rooney, "that you're sitting in my seat."