Two old ladies are sat on a park bench chatting away and smoking when it starts raining. One of the old ladies takes a condom out of her handbag, cuts the end off, and slips it over her cigarette to keep the rain off.

"What a good idea," says the other one, "I think I'll buy some of those." So she wanders off down the chemist.

She goes up to the counter and says, "can I have a packet of condoms please?"

"Of course," says the assistant, "what type would you like?"

"I don't mind," she replies, "just as long they fit a Camel..."